Archive for April, 2012|Monthly archive page

The Expendables (2010)

The Expendables

★★☆☆☆

Directed by: Sylvester Stallone

Written by: David Callaham and Sylvester Stallone

What amused me the most about The Expendables is how there is zero emotional heft to the film, and the protagonists are never in serious danger. You might think, in a film like this where there are a half-dozen roughnecks as the principals, that one or more of them was destined to croak in your standard action/buddy formula to provide a reason for the survivors to rally and defeat the odds. But no. Everyone lives. I guess that’s a spoiler? The thing is, it’s never really even implied that one of these guys might not make it. They take down literally hundreds of apparently highly-trained soldiers with the realism and nonchalance of saturday morning G.I.Joes, only with more blood and shorn body parts and stuff.

I guess this is supposed to be an old-school action film with practically every 80s and 90s action star under the sun, but even though we’re supposed to care that Jason Statham’s Lee Christmas lost his girl to a douchey jock, it’s not possible because Lee Christmas is not a character but a tool for the script to show that even guys who stick knives into people’s necks for a living feel sad sometimes. There’s some sort of claptrap about these mercenaries doing things for a greater cause, but it’s muddy and uninteresting. There’s one scene that could be decent but it’s like something from another movie, where Mickey Rourke as Tool reminisces about the darkness that weighs on a conscience from senseless brutality, but whatever power could have come from a monologue like that is comically undone by the gleefully senseless brutality the movie traffics in to sell itself. I guess it’s okay to watch people being cut apart for entertainment but if you have to do the cutting it makes you wax poetic in a blue light? I didn’t really get what it was all about. Really it’s just some random words to make the audience feel like there is a moral imperative for Stallone and Statham and Jet Li and some other people to go slaughter people.

There’s really no point to this movie, which I say knowing full well that when I started watching it I just wanted to watch a big dumb action movie. I guess it barely succeeds at that, but nothing else going on is worth much of your time, except to remind yourself occasionally that Stallone is old enough to be Jason Statham’s dad, is old enough to be the grandfather of Giselle Itié (who is the sorta love interest, Sandra) and yet somehow manages to not be comical just on a surface level as he engages in cinematic fisticuffs with Stone Cold Steve Austin. It’s pretty impressive, really.

from No Thief Like a Bad MovieApril 30, 2012 at 10:54AM

Hot Tub Time Machine (2010)

Hot Tub Time Machine

★★☆☆☆

Directed by: Steve Pink

Written by: Josh Heald, Sean Anders and John Morris

Admittedly, you can’t go into a movie called “Hot Tub Time Machine” with high expectations. But I did kind of think that it had the potential to be a stupid/silly good time, and attributed the fact that it doesn’t have much community love to the fact that the premise is ridiculous. I was in a mood where ridiculous premises were okay by me, so I gave it a shot. The thing is, the premise isn’t the problem here, and in fact it’s a medium entertaining dude-oriented romantic comedy (which is to say it’s very bromantic). That should be enough to earn it a modest three stars. The main problem is that it isn’t very funny. I could forgive almost everything else that Hot Tub Time Machine struggles with if only there had been some decent laughs, but there are really none.

The truly distasteful aspect of the movie, though, is that it seems like the moral of the story is that the only way you can change your life for the better is by going back and doing it all over again, making completely different decisions. Apparently, it also helps to have the deck stacked heavily in your favor. There was even the potential for something along those lines to be said in a funny, ironic or ridiculous fashion considering the means for the shift comes from the character who seems to be the most stuck in the past at the start of the film. But never mind all that, because Hot Tub Time Machine may have potential, but it squanders all of it at every opportunity and leaves in its wake a silly trifle that is safely and easily skipped.

from No Thief Like a Bad MovieApril 30, 2012 at 10:52AM

Goodnight Dune

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from Like a Detuned RadioApril 30, 2012 at 10:18AM

Kansas City Public Library

Kansas City Public Library

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from Like a Detuned RadioApril 30, 2012 at 09:14AM

Going for the parenting achievement, “Survived Inane Children’s Concert.” also doing it in hard mode: sober.

@ironsoapApril 28, 2012 at 06:16PM

Spiral of Books

from InstagramApril 28, 2012 at 04:19PM

betterbooktitles: Ernest Cline: Ready Player One Reader…

betterbooktitles:

Ernest Cline: Ready Player One

Reader Submission: Title and Redesign by Jenny Savage.

It’s funny ‘cause it’s true.

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from Like a Detuned RadioApril 25, 2012 at 03:04PM

herochan: Batman …completed in warm and cool grey copic…

herochan:

Batman

…completed in warm and cool grey copic markers, white ink, and colored pencil on 9×12 Strathmore 400 Series Medium drawing paper. 

Art by Richard Cox

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from Like a Detuned RadioApril 25, 2012 at 02:43PM

Daily Doodle #7: Wall-e! by PodgyPanda on Flickr.

Daily Doodle #7: Wall-e! by PodgyPanda on Flickr.

#podgypanda, dailydoodle, wall-e, eva, awww, mushy shit

from Like a Detuned RadioApril 25, 2012 at 02:22PM

The Well of Ascension (Mistborn, #2)

The Well of Ascension (Mistborn, #2)
author: Brandon Sanderson
name: Paul
average rating: 4.15
book published: 2007
rating: 4
read at: 2012/04/25
date added: 2012/04/25
shelves: fantasy, novel
review:
When I first finished Mistborn, I thought that I would rush straight into the second book in Brandon Sanderson‘s series. I even went pretty far out of my way to secure a copy of The Well of Ascension. But then, I hesitated. I read a couple of other books instead. At first I wasn’t even sure why I seemed reluctant to dive in, but upon further reflection I realized that the problem was that I had loved Mistborn so very much that I was afraid a sequel might not live up to the expectations set by the first.

There is precedence for this, in fact. I read and loved Anne Rice‘s The Witching Hour years ago, then started book two, Lasher, only to literally throw the book across the room within the first few chapters, disgusted by what unfolded there. I never finished it and my opinion of the first was sullied. I don’t even remember now what I liked about the first Mayfair Witches volume. Stephen King nearly lost me as well in the opening pages of The Drawing of the Three which followed the remarkable The Gunslinger with a seemingly devastating character event. I stuck with King through a couple more books, but the extended break I had to give myself before I could face Roland again put distance between me and the series, one I’ve never been able to recover.

I was afraid, in fact, that Mistborn, despite being an imperfect novel (no one is likely to mistake Sanderson for a literary genius), was so fun and so exciting and so right up my alley with even a completely satisfying conclusion that made the book wholly standalone, a sequel had the chance to undo that. I subconsciously wanted to give myself some time to just bask in the giddiness of having read a really good book. However, after a couple of weeks, I had to finally admit I had no choice. Knowing there were more adventures out there to be experienced with Vin and Sazed and Breeze and the crew, I needed to know what else Sanderson could come up with.

I’ll say this right off the bat: The Well of Ascension is not as good as Mistborn. In a way, I’m not sure it could be. Mistborn is a novel of discovery, of revealing, while The Well of Ascension is a novel where much of that exploration has already occurred. By this point we’re familiar with Allomancy, we understand what Mistings and Mistborn can do, we know some of the nature of Obligators and Steel Inquisitors, and the Final Empire is a place we’ve been before. So instead, The Well of Ascension has to be about happenings, about events that take place within that framework set up so well by the first novel.

And in part, that’s the core flaw in Well, because the events that Sanderson chooses for this book are grand in scope and impact but limited in intrigue. The book chronicles the aftermath of Mistborn, where the survivors are now tasked with keeping the central setting of Luthadel secure now that everything has changed. Doing so is not going to be easy, of course. The power vacuum has made Luthadel and its fledgling government a target, and one by one three distinct armies lay siege to the city. The new government struggles to determine how to deal with the impending invasion(s) while working through the growing pains of any new leadership. Meanwhile, a more ominous and less tangible threat begins to take form, and the walls start to close in on the cast of still-wonderful characters.

Part of what I loved about Mistborn is that it was so gripping: full of tension, unpredictable and full of a kinetic energy that kept the pages always turning. The Well of Ascension is successful in its way because it maintains the tense atmosphere (I’m inclined to say it is even more taut, with the stakes raising from grim to hopeless to utterly bleak by about the halfway point) and remains just as unexpected as the first. Where it falls short of Mistborn is that, without that sense of newness that made the first volume so exciting, Well grinds down at times, especially in the first third, to something that isn’t ever close to boring, but is—to butcher a phrase—put-downable.

This is something that eventually goes away, and the final quarter of the book is ridiculous almost in how breakneck fast it moves. I mean, you know it’s got a no-brakes ending when the “epic journey foretold in legend” doesn’t even begin until there are less than 150 pages left in a 700+ page novel. The early parts of the book have their moments of triumph, but one does have to acknowledge that by comparison the book can feel very weighted in terms of significant events toward the back. This was true in Mistborn as well, but it felt less like a flaw because the slow burn to that point was full of so much wonder. Here, that wonder is replaced by some compelling character arcs, including several fascinating new additions (and subtractions) to the core cast, but developing characters just isn’t quite as much fun in a fantasy setting as developing the world, so the odds were kind of stacked against this book. I think, perhaps, this is what I feared all along during those weeks where I saw the book sitting on my shelf, but I was reluctant to open it.

But, I can admit when I’m wrong. Despite The Well of Ascension being not quite as amazing as its predecessor, it’s inferior only by comparison to a book I adored. Which is to say, taken by its own merits, Well is a triumph in its own rights. The most impressive part about it, perhaps, is that it manages to be satisfying in spite of being an Act Two book. It’s obvious by the end that we’re going to need at least one more sequel to finish the tale (I happen to know now that there is a fourth book as well) Mistborn began, but where other series or trilogies might simply drop a cliffhanger on the reader, content to know that two books in most readers will be committed to at least a third, but The Well of Ascension actually has a real ending. It’s not The End, true, but it doesn’t leave you feeling like you’re dangling, rather it neatly ties up the central conflicts it presented and then paves the way for the much greater conflict to come. Lots of people could learn from Sanderson about how to finish series books.

My final recommendation is that, if you read Mistborn, don’t hesitate to start The Well of Ascension. It’s a bigger book, in scale and size, and it’s not quite as taut as a result, but you’ll welcome the chance to catch up with these characters and a new excuse to revisit this world.

from Paul’s bookshelf: readApril 25, 2012 at 09:00AM