Posted September 1, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on Listen humans: if you don’t want people to eavesdrop on you, don’t be interesting and/or weird in public.
Posted August 31, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on Team lunches on the boss are less exciting when lunch is free everyday. And I’m a little concerned no one will tell me where we’re going.
Posted August 29, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on Got a call from my daughter’s school saying she was sick. Went down there and teacher said, “We may have a fibber on our hands.”
Posted August 26, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on Hi! It looks like you’re trying to grow a handlebar mustache! Should I: A) Point, laugh B) Applaud your celibacy commitment C) GPS saloons
Posted August 26, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on Yes, AIM, I get it. I sign in from multiple locations a lot. A 40 word message on all devices/locations every single time, though? #relax
Posted August 24, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on Recalling having enough hair to headbang. Also when I wasn’t old and could do it. And mosh pits. I’m too old for metal.
Posted August 24, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on My megamix playlist just did Chopin’s “Mazurka No. in A Minor” followed by White Zombie’s “Thrust!” so I’m headbanging through the tears.
Posted August 24, 2012
Filed under: Twitter | Comments Off on If a hip-hop artist dedicates a song to someone, do they say, “I rapped you a present”? (the preceding bad pun not endorsed by @DixieGirl)